陶志健:英诗新译五首

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进入专题: 翻译  

陶志健  


作者记:众多经典英文诗歌,早有前辈筚路蓝缕,译介海内。时人译家亦众,各有千秋。然诗无达诂,自无达译。我因读诗,时觉理解略现不同,偶欲献上所感;又常见原作格律甚整,实为其诗不可或缺之品性要素,略望探寻如何以中文再现其妙。遂边玩边译,后又不断修改,终得本文所列之版本。然英文与中文差别甚巨,诗的格律更难相匹,确乃实情。故译文虽以中诗韵律节奏为基本,却无固定的对应格式,也未受严格的音韵限制;惟尽己所能,持守原诗意味,并体现其音韵节奏之感。未敢妄言兼顾,但求二者相衡。不揣浅陋,于此奉上,以求教于同好。


文 | 陶志健,学者、翻译,麦吉尔大学博士



1、紫杜鹃 ——答问花自何方来


R.W.爱默生


五月海风破寂寥,

林中喜见杜鹃娆,

花放满枝幽境栖,

欢娱荒漠悦缓溪。

紫瓣飘飘坠碧池,

幽水欣欣凭落英;

红雀或来凉羽翅,

愧色向花诉衷情。

若有圣贤问杜鹃,

焉弃芳容天地间,

答之生眼为睛明,

丽质当因丽质生;

堪比玫瑰焉落此?

未曾自问未曾晓;

若依浅见试猜思,

君来我至皆天道。


译注:原诗五步抑扬格,aabbcdcdeeffghgh韵式,似为十四行诗之拓展,措辞古雅。故仿古风,而依原韵式迻译。


原文:

The Rhodora

by Ralph Waldo Emerson


On Being Asked, Whence Is The Flower?


In May, when sea-winds pierced our solitudes,

I found the fresh Rhodora in the woods,

Spreading its leafless blooms in a damp nook,

To please the desert and the sluggish brook.

The purple petals, fallen in the pool,

Made the black water with their beauty gay;

Here might the red-bird come his plumes to cool,

And court the flower that cheapens his array.

Rhodora! if the sages ask thee why

This charm is wasted on the earth and sky,

Tell them, dear, that if eyes were made for seeing,

Then Beauty is its own excuse for being:

Why thou wert there, O rival of the rose!

I never thought to ask, I never knew:

But, in my simple ignorance, suppose

The self-same Power that brought me there brought you.


2、不要驯然遁入那个长夜


狄伦·托马斯


不要驯然遁入那个长夜,

老年临暮理当燃烧咆哮;

怒斥,怒斥光明竟将熄灭。



智者临终固知黑暗难却,

但因话语未作雷电闪耀,

不会驯然遁入那个长夜。



善者尾波已尽自叹己业,

本可绿色湾中闪亮一跳,

怒斥,怒斥光明竟将熄灭。



浪者及时欢唱太阳飞跃,

辜负光阴太晚方才悟晓,

不甘驯然遁入那个长夜。



肃穆者临终凭眩灭视觉,

得见盲眼欣如流星闪耀,

怒斥,怒斥光明竟将熄灭。



而父亲您立高处空悲切,

求您挥泪骂我为我祈祷。

不要驯然遁入那个长夜。

怒斥,怒斥光明竟将熄灭。


译注:

1、这是一首维拉内尔(villanelle),格律甚严:五个三行诗节加一个四行诗节,五步抑扬格,韵式为aba aba aba aba aba abaa,第一个诗节的一三两行作为叠句在后面的诗节末行轮流重复,并在四行诗节中共同收尾。依体作诗甚难如意,而托马斯此作堪称典范。


2、恩师巫宁坤之译品,颇得原诗精髓及力道;我谨以此译,整理音韵,步其后尘,致敬吾师。


原文:

Do not go gentle into that good night


Dylan Thomas



Do not go gentle into that good night,

Old age should burn and rave at close of day;

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.



Though wise men at their end know dark is right,

Because their words had forked no lightning they

Do not go gentle into that good night.



Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright

Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.



Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,

And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,

Do not go gentle into that good night.



Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight

Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.



And you, my father, there on the sad height,

Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.

Do not go gentle into that good night.

Rage, rage against the dying of the light.



3、独居赋


亚历山大·蒲伯


(原体版)


幸哉此叟无奢冀,

心系家传几亩田,

惬意呼吸乡里气,

足立自家园。



自家牛奶自家谷,

自产羊毛做裤衫,

家树绿荫消夏暑,

柴木御冬寒。



置身时外为福幸,

岁月悠悠看逝川,

身健体康心底静,

日默夜酣眠。



读书间憩为闲客,

娱乐怡情意趣宽,

抱朴持真最快乐,

沉思心自安。



但愿无闻生若杳,

惟期无泣死如然;

悄声离世无人晓,

无碑识长眠。



(七绝版)

幸哉此叟无奢愿,

心系家传几亩田,

惬意呼吸乡里气,

舒心站立自家园。


自家牛奶自家谷,

自产羊毛做裤衫,

夏避树林消酷暑,

冬收柴木御严寒。


置身时外为福幸,

岁月悠悠看逝川,

身健体康心底静,

日间少语夜酣眠。


读书间憩有余闲,

娱乐怡情意趣宽,

抱朴持真称惬快,

沉思默想心神安。


但愿无闻生若杳,

惟期无泣死如然;

悄声离世无人晓,

不立石碑识长眠。


译注:

1、原诗每节前三行为四步抑扬格,末行为二步抑扬格,节奏有类“三句半”,却略呈宋词意味。拙译(原体版)模拟其体,并依原韵式,而持其中一韵,一贯到底。


2、拙译(七绝版)每节采用七绝格律,一韵到底,时而得以兼顾原诗韵式,或也另有意趣?


原文:

Ode on Solitude


Alexander Pope



Happy the man, whose wish and care

A few paternal acres bound,

Content to breathe his native air,

In his own ground.


Whose herds with milk, whose fields with bread,

Whose flocks supply him with attire,

Whose trees in summer yield him shade,

In winter fire.


Blest! who can unconcern'dly find

Hours, days, and years slide soft away,

In health of body, peace of mind,

Quiet by day,


Sound sleep by night; study and ease

Together mix'd; sweet recreation,

And innocence, which most does please,

With meditation.


Thus let me live, unseen, unknown;

Thus unlamented let me die;

Steal from the world, and not a stone

Tell where I lie.



4、我欲将君比夏日 (商籁体之十八)


威廉·莎士比亚


我欲将君比夏日,

君比夏日更娇婉。

柔花五月遭风笞,

夏日匆匆期苦短。


天眼时时凭自烈,

黄金颜面亦常阴;

芳容芳色有时谢,

天灭天生无定因;


君之夏日永不涸,

君之美貌永不凋,

死神徒叹奈君何,

诗篇恒久君寿高。

人但呼吸眼但亮,

君随此作永流芳。


译注:莎翁这首十四行诗译者尤为众多,各有精妙。拙译采用七言句型,循原韵式:abab, cdcd, efef, gg。


原文:

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? (Sonnet 18)

William Shakespeare


Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?

Thou art more lovely and more temperate.

Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,

And summer’s lease hath all too short a date.

Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,

And often is his gold complexion dimmed;

And every fair from fair sometime declines,

By chance, or nature’s changing course, untrimmed;

But thy eternal summer shall not fade,

Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow’st,

Nor shall death brag thou wand'rest in his shade,

When in eternal lines to Time thou grow'st.

So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see,

So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.


5、一世无争


沃尔特·萨维奇·兰德


(七绝版)

一世无争不屑争;

自然吾爱艺吾情。

人生之火温双手,

火萎何辞踏去程。


(五律版)

从未与人斗,无人值我争。

自然吾挚爱,艺术我真情。

生命火曾旺,火温伴我行;

而今火既萎,何吝踏归程。


译注:原诗读来虽轻散,却格律甚整。现试呈上七绝五律个版本,前者亦可于首行改一字为“一世无争不屑斗”,而合原韵式。


原文:

I Strove With None

Walter Savage Landor


I strove with none, for none was worth my strife;

Nature I loved, and next to Nature, Art;

I warmed both hands before the fire of Life;

It sinks, and I am ready to depart.


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